10.19.2012 - 10.19.2012
I've always wanted to have one of those neurotic New York artistic families like Lena Dunham's. How does someone become an artist? Do you read Nietzsche and smoke too much pot? Then do you have children who you treat as adults at too young an age?
We went to some free artists' talk at the Bronx Museum today. It was just to be out somewhere and eat free food. It reminded me of college, and then I thought, But this is real. She's some kind of small-time artist, but she somehow makes a living from it, and here's a (albeit scanty) collection of people who appreciate what she does. It's not good to have too many choices.
I wanted to like her work more than I did. I thought that maybe if I liked it, it would mean that I understood something about visual art, that it would be some sort of initiation for me. Instead it just occurred to me that Jess should have been an artist. Even if she were a hack, or just mediocre... No, I guess it's better not to be a hack. I wonder why she thinks I can "make it" when she's so grateful her parents made her see she couldn't. Is it something to do with my flavor of angst?