04.12.2013 - 04.12.2013
Listless. What a useless, boring state. Today's listlessness comes from a too-long nap in the afternoon and an innocuous email from my father that nonetheless left me feeling anxious. Just the word "plan" from him elicits this reaction, and suddenly all our thinking about Chris becoming a divemaster and us living abroad for a while seems like a silly daydream.
I like not knowing what my future holds. Is it comforting to map out your path to its furthest extremity, this your one and only life? There's such a wide gap between what I believe is best for myself and what "they" want. (They give so much, but their giving is like a trap.) Well, it is a useless refrain.
We're in Satun right now. Tomorrow we head to Malaysia. Onward. Is it more marching or drifting? We've eaten well here. More than made up for hungry nights in Ko Lipe when I was too lazy to venture out again in the wet and instead lay curled up in the mosquito net daydreaming about pizza. It was a beautiful daydream. Here we have difficulty conserving our stomachs so we have enough room for all we want to eat. It'll be sad to leave Thailand and its good food.